A Lesson in Irony

"Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding."       ~Agnes Repplier

Last weekend our dishwasher broke. Again. It’s been a piece of shit since the day we bought our house, even though it was brand new. (Brand new, bottom of the line.) Steve is handy and he has repaired it numerous times – once holding together an internal part with a band-aid because that’s the only adhesive we had on hand at the time.

But this time, try as he might, all the band-aids in the world couldn't get it going again.

It was bitter-sweet really. I have had a hate on for the dishwasher for some time. A busy woman such as myself does not have time to pre-wash dishes, then run them through a 3 hour dishwasher cycle, and then wash them again (and dry them!) when the dishwasher cycle is done.

I was not sad to see the old dishwasher go but I was sad that I would have to part with a bunch of credit on my new American Express card in order to replace it.

Steve and I argued over discussed the most economical way to get a new one. A friend suggested I go to the discount appliance store where they sell appliances that have small flaws in them – a small scratch or a little dent in some place that likely nobody would notice, at a reduced cost. I was good with that. Steve was not. He didn’t want some dinged-up piece of junk! He wanted something new with no flaws.

So off I went to Lowes one afternoon, selected a middle of the line dishwasher, bought it, had it loaded in the van and brought it home.

That night, Steve got to work taking the old one out and installing the new one. However, when he removed the packaging from the new one he called me into the room to tell me there was a dent in the kick plate (plate at the front/bottom of the dishwasher). Just our luck!

I was really quite disappointed. What to do? I told him that he would need to package it back up and we would return it.

He said, “No, it’ll be fine. Nobody will notice the dent.”

The irony completely lost on him. And in order to avoid an argument, I chose to shut my trap (for once) and not painstakingly explain it to him.

I would have felt the same way (nobody will notice it!) if we had bought it from the DISCOUNT appliance store! But since I paid full price on MY credit card, I was not going to have a dented kick plate installed on my brand new dishwasher.

So he phoned Lowes and and it was arranged that they would take the kick plate off another dishwasher and I just needed to bring in the dented one and we’d trade.

The following Monday I entered the Lowes with my dented kick plate and asked for the one they had set aside for me. The customer service girl retrieved the replacement kick plate but had an odd look on her face when she brought it out. We both looked at the replacement and saw that it, too, was dented!

I then spoke with the gentleman that sold me the dishwasher in the first place. He said that they could order a new dishwasher and when it came in (in two weeks), they could take the (hopefully undented) kick plate off and I could come in at that time and pick it up.


They could give me a 10% discount on the cost of the dishwasher and we could be done with it.

I said I’d likely take the discount but just had to quickly check in with my husband to make sure that would be OK with him.

I phoned him and told him our options. He burst out with, “Take the discount! That’s a great deal!!!”

I say nothing....