I'm allergic to something.  No idea what.  It seems to be lack of sleep. Is that possible?

Often after a few days of shitty or little sleep, I will experience some sort of allergy attack.  My nose gets ITCHY!! Insane itchy. And I sneeze and sneeze and sneeze!  And I can't breathe.  And my eyes want to close.  My lips get dry. My head hurts.  I get cold. Then I get hot.  And of course I'm exhausted because I've had a few days of shitty or little sleep and there is no option to slip in a nap.

Yesterday I OD'd on Benadryl.  I normally only take it at night but yesterday my face felt like there was an active bee hive under my skin and my watery eyes would not open. I was desperate for relief so I took 2 Benedryl tablets.

Oh wow was I ever fucked up.  I haven't been that stoned, ever! 

Ok, well maybe that's not entirely true.

But I haven't been that stoned ever, on legal narcotics.

Ok, that might not be true either.

But it's been a REALLY long time since I've been that high - on anything, legal or otherwise. It was wild.

I sat slumped in my chair with drool running out of the corner of my mouth and snot trickling down my face while my children screamed and whined and climbed all over me and threw books at my head and my husband looked at me, disgusted, like I had just shot up heroin in front of my kids and had Ruby load the syringe while Lincoln tied off my arm.  (Empathy and sympathy are not his strong suits.)

Today he told me I can't do Benadryl during the day, in front of the kids anymore.

He also seems annoyed that I'm still sick.  He asked me 3 times before noon if I had tried blowing my nose?  What?  Blow my nose?  Why, the thought had never occurred to me.

By the way, could you take out the garbage which is overflowing with USED KLEENEX tissues?


I have always taken great pride in the appearance of my children when I take them out of the house.  I prefer to have them dressed in decent, clean, matching clothes, hair combed, faces washed. It sometimes takes a little extra effort and time to get out of the house but it makes me feel proud of them when we're out.

Today though, I needed to walk them to the store and by god I couldn't give a fuck what they looked like.  Lincoln had no shoes on and had a huge, dark purple patch on his head where Ruby decided to color him with markers. Crusty, snotty nose. Runny eyes.

And Ruby... well... The hair was half in a pony tail. Same crusty snotty nose as her bro. She drew all over her arms so she could have tattoos like mom.  Cute, huh? Then she wiped her snotty nose with her inked arm and smeared the blue ink from her nose across her cheek. It crusted and dried there, like thick blue snot.  Her shirt was too big, her pants too small. Gumboots on the wrong feet.

Ohhhh! What adorable children you have.

I can't taste food - which might make normal people stop eating.  But I can't stop feeding myself.  Everything tastes the same so it would be a great time to consume extra veggies, right?  No, I prefer chocolate and danishes.  With coffee that burns my stomach and might as well be boiled, black, mud water. 

The children are running free range and wild through the house. It takes one little squeak or whine and I will give them whatever they want. Cookies, pizza, chips, more cookies... I have allowed them to eat rice on the carpet and to draw on the kitchen floor (and each other, as previously mentioned).  If nobody gets seriously injured today I will consider it a success. 

I have considered ramming a wire brush down my throat to stop the itching.

If it is lack of sleep that causes this "condition" (and if it's not lack of sleep it's a very odd and strange coincidence), it's hard to recover from it since it's pretty impossible to sleep with snot running out of your nose while you sneeze 17 times in a row, your lips are cracked and dry, and you have to wake up every 20 minutes to sip water for your parched and dry mouth because you are stuffed up and mouth breathing.   nose. 

It's a long, slow recovery process.