Dear husbands… I do realize that the little filter between your brain and your mouth is not always functioning at full capacity. However, you are only going to make your own life very difficult if you cannot prevent something like the following conversation from occurring:
A husband and wife crawl into bed after a long day. The wife fluffs up her pillow and then slides over to cuddle with her husband. The husband lays his head down and looks into his wife’s eyes.
He pauses and then says, “Did you puke today??”
The wife exclaims, “NO! Why?!”
The husband replies, “Oh. Never mind. Your face just looks like you did.”
Husbands, should your brain/mouth filter malfunction in such a way and a conversation that resembles the above occur just prior to bedtime, you may want to then do a quick sweep of the house to ensure all weapons are secured under lock and key and that you have swallowed the keys. Even then your safety can not be 100% guaranteed and you may find it wise to forgo sleep for at least a week (possibly longer). In fact, it may not be in your best interest to close your eyes at all for quite some time - not even to blink.