Goal achieved

I managed to acheive my goal to finish reading Red Dog, Red Dog by October 31st when Wally Lamb's new book, The Hour I First Believed" comes out.

Only trouble was that I finished the book a week early. On my grumpy Sunday I retired early and read the last few pages. I really liked this book and thought it was good and entertaining.

So I have to find other ways to fill my time this week and make my eyes tired at bedtime.

I do have company arriving tomorrow night and staying until Monday morning. Company that I'm much looking forward to seeing - so I'm sure that their presence will take up much of my spare energy and time and I should have no trouble getting my eyes tired enough for bedtime.

Wally Lamb - we'll see you next week!

Two in a row? No go.

I had hoped that today would be as good as yesterday but unfortunately I just couldn't make it happen.

I tried though. I got up this morning and took the dog for a walk and Steve joined us. I didn't even have to beg or bribe him - he suggested that we all go together! And it was again a beautiful and brisk fall day - except that this time when I got home, I didn't feel refreshed and rejuvenated - I felt like shit. My back hurt and I felt like going back to bed.

I pushed on though and we went down to Ikea to pick up a replacement duvet cover as my current one met with the unfortunate demise of a snarky Boston Terrier:

Usually, a little shopping is great for my mood but not today... Even though we were at Ikea early enough to beat the crowds, the few people that were there had obviously conspired before I got there and were clearly intent in getting in my way, cutting me off, walking slow and just generally trying to piss me off.

After leaving there we decided to hit the home reno store because I need some sort of closet organizer for Baby Roberts' room. On the way to that store I became so overcome with fatigue that I couldn't stay awake and even though I was having a conversation with Steve, my head started bobbing and I eventually fell into a drooling sleep. The whole drive took about 10 minutes. When we got to the home reno store I felt secretly pissed off that we got there so soon and I had to actually wake up and drag myself through the store. (And also my sweater felt hot and itchy.)

And closet organizers? A rip off. I was shocked (maybe from just coming from Ikea) at the price of them! I only have an itty bitty closet that I need to organize and the stupid units available would have cost us well over $100 and weren't even what I really wanted. *sigh* Empty handed and really irritated (at least I was), we left and headed home.

Upon arriving home I jumped into my pyjamas and lay down on the couch with full intent on having a nap. Maybe even one of those 2 or 3 hour ones that I had earlier in the week...

Steve fell asleep and had a nap. Quincy fell asleep and had a nap. I did NOT get to fall asleep and have a nap. I may have started to doze once or twice but I just couldn't get comfortable and was too hot or too cold and a nap just wasn't happening.

It was all I could do to not go poke Steve and Quincy in their pleasantly dreaming eyelids.

And so, my day today was not as great as yesterday, despite my best efforts.

Steve, being the good man that he is, made a trip to the store and picked up everything he needed to make dinner and he's currently doing just that.

And being the wise man that he is, he also picked up some chocolate... which he has been periodically throwing into my cage from a safe distance.

A good day

I was up at 6am but was able to fall back asleep until 9:30am. I cannot tell you how good it felt to roll over and see that time on the clock. Sleep has not been great lately and so a little sleep-in on a Saturday morning made a nice start to my day.

I kept the good vibes rolling by immediately throwing on my yoga pants and a t-shirt (as opposed to staying in my pyjamas). I put on my runners and put a collar and a leash on the dog and out we went for a walk around the neighborhood in the cool, brisk fall air. While I was a little uncomfortable by the time I got home, I still felt refreshed.

Then I started working on my laundry and managed to get most of it done. You would be hard pressed to find a dirty pair of undies laying on the floor of my bedroom now! (Unless there is a pair under the bed, in which case they will stay there for the next few months as getting down there to retrieve them would be pretty much impossible for me right now.)

In between laundry loads I did some housework and made what's left of my bed (Quincy has ripped a few holes in my duvet cover because she's rebelling that I still won't let her sleep with us - and I desperately need to get to Ikea to get something to replace it until I can afford a nicer, more luxurious one).

I just finished making up two home made pizzas which we will cook tonight and eat while we are watching the Canucks game, lounging on the couch.

If only the Canucks can manage to pull off a somewhat entertaining win.... I will have had a decent day.

What do you do....

...when your boobs have gotten so big that you now require a bra size that would be proportionate to woman who is approximately 6"3 in stature and you're only 5"2 and so the straps are WAY too long - even when cinched to their smallest setting - and they are constantly sliding off your shoulders, and it becomes so incredibly annoying that you might consider saying "fuck it" and forgoing bra wearing all together except that if you stopped wearing a bra you might be mistaken for a wet t-shirt contestant due to milk leakage????

(sounds hot, I know)

And they're going to double in size over the next couple of months? Really???

Is that possible????

Already gone

Why is it that when you're preparing for time away from your job - such as a vacation or in my case, maternity leave - that the closer you get to that magic date, more and more shit piles up?

Reports that nobody has asked for in 3 years are suddenly required, all with updated information.

One employee is suddenly unsure if he was paid the correct rate for one week in either June or July of 2005 and he's not sure exactly which week but he needs to know ASAP or he's filing a grievance.

Another employee is suddenly positive that the company has ripped him off for one week's vacation in 2007 and a reconciliation if all his vacation from January 1st, 2007 until now needs to be done. ASAP, of course

The person who is taking over your job for you starts calling six times a day asking questions that she already knows the answer to but just wants to check to be sure.

Your boss wants to make sure you learn how to do this new, elaborate accounting procedure even though you won't be here to use it over the next year and by the time you return, chances are good that the procedure will have changed anyways...

People! I have less than 3 weeks left here, I am less and less interested in this job as each day goes by. I sit here on auto pilot each day, staring out the window most of the day. I don't give a shit about your vacation time or your reports or your new accounting procedure.

I'm not going to be here for a whole year and you will have to find a way to work out your problems yourselves.

So leave me alone already.

I am already gone.

That's the way we roll

Baby Roberts will be rollin' in style when she arrives.

Check out the new wheels from Grandma and Grandpa Roberts:

It's the all-in-one model, complete with snap-in infant car seat. Baby Roberts can go from car to stroller to car in a couple of "easy" snaps. I'm really excited about it and relieved to have this item in my house and put together, ready to go. They don't let the baby leave the hospital without the car seat.

But someone who lives in this house does not find it very exciting at all...

Quincy has always had a big hate/fear of wheels. She would rather throw herself in front of a moving car than share the same sidewalk with a bicycle, skateboard or... stroller.

So when we first brought the stroller into the house in parts - no big deal. But when Steve was putting it together and the wheels went on, she started to realize what it was and she was none too happy. She spent a good hour circling the stroller and barking viciously at it. And then she went and sat in the closet.

The stroller has been residing in Baby Roberts' room and this is about as close as Quincy will get to it.

I really hope she can overcome her hate/fear because it would be nice to be able to go for walks with Baby Roberts AND Quincy some day. And not like this:


I want to write, I really do.

I had a post in my head that I was going to produce tonight, but this is not it.

Steve is currently putting away groceries, cleaning the kitchen and unloading/reloading the dishwasher. Normally I would be doing it myself or maybe we might be doing it together.

Tonight I am just too tired.

It is barely 7:30pm and I'm in my jammies and heading to bed. No shower before bed as I usually do. No snack before bed. No energy for the shower and food is... meh to me this evening. I will be climbing into bed within the next 5 minutes and cracking my book. I'll read until I can't hold the book up any longer which will likely have me sleeping by 8pm.

Oh ~ I'm reading Red Dog Red Dog by Patrick Lane. My goal is to have it finished by October 31st when Wally Lamb's new book comes out.

I figure I should be able to do it easily - although I doubt tonight will get me very far towards my goal.

This just in...

Babies are expensive!!!

Yeah we all knew that to begin with but when you start out $20,000 in the hole just to GET pregnant - you're really screwed.

And now that I've got less than 10 weeks to go (give or take 2 weeks) I really need to get things done and ready.

I do have a good start on Baby Roberts' room though - thanks in part to the kindness and wallets of other people.

The first thing I owned for Baby Roberts was her crib. I searched high and low for something a little bit different, something sturdy and something of good quality. It took me months but I did find a crib that I fell in love with. Big thanks to Grandma Wright for generously buying Baby Roberts the crib, mattress, and mattress protector. Here it is, fitted with the bedding that I recently bought:

Quincy doesn't like the crib or bedding much but that's just because it's not for her:

I found the bedding on the internet and since it was an American company that makes it, I didn't think I'd ever find it in Canada. But I did, just by total, pure luck. And it was a little bit on the expensive side but it was really the only bedding that I had found that I really liked. Particularly I'm in love with the cherry blossoms, and I love that it's not overly "baby-ish". And so out came the already injured credit card.

And then after these two purchases, things kind of stalled for a while. I really needed a dresser but again wanted something sturdy and with good quality. Unfortunately I couldn't find anything besides Ikea particle board crap within my price range so when I did find the perfect dresser which matches the crib perfectly, I once again pulled the old credit card out and charged it (and felt a bit sick for it afterwards). It was a very expensive piece of furniture but I feel like it's worth it. It is going to double as a change table (when I get a change pad to go on top) and it can be used forever because it's not "baby-ish" - meaning Baby Roberts won't grow out of it.

Note: Sitting on top of the dresser is Baby Roberts' first book, two receiving blankets, a little fleece blanket and a mattress cover - all courtesy of crazy Grandma Wright. Grandpa Wright commented recently on how excited Grandma Wright is about Baby Roberts that he's surprised she hasn't been arrested yet for stalking random new born babies she sees in the mall or on the streets.

Also on top of the dresser are some cool hooks I found a while ago that caught my eye and also a neat "diaper clutch" which I saw and liked and so Steve bought it for me.

Inside the dresser you would find two diapers and a quarter sized container of diaper cream which I got as samples at a baby fair. That should last until potty training time, right?? Right??

I've also got this really cool frame that is going to look very cool in the room if only I can find something neat to go in it. I may end up just going to a glass/mirror place and having a mirror cut to fit inside it. It looks so cool with the rest of the room decor:

Here's a shot of the room all together (minus the above frame):

Note the antique rocking chair in the corner, which was donated by my friend Marta. It was in her family for years and years. It is a shorter chair and my feet actually touch the ground when I sit in it - which is remarkable because I never find chairs that are appropriate for my height and also because Marta and her family are all quite tall.

I also had full intentions of painting the room (which is the same color as every other room in the house). I had started picking out colors but then realized that the color that is on the walls right now actually doesn't look too bad with the decor and also that I am getting too big and tired and mentally exhausted to try to co-ordinate any paint color. So what do you say? The walls look good that color, no?

And that brings to an end, our baby tour for today. Why? Because now you've seen everything I have. I'm freaked at how much stuff babies need! And how little of that stuff I actually have. And how little energy I have lately to deal with all of it! And how much I have to learn about all of this. (Thank god for prenatal classes) I keep thinking that things will just fall into place and I'll get a burst of energy and a burst of funds (perhaps cashing in the OT at work??) and a burst of brain and it will all be ready when Baby Roberts decides to get here.

T minus 10 weeks to go....

(I really try not to post too much about being pregnant, or baby stuff or whatever but right now it's all I've got going on. So it's pregnancy/baby stuff or nothin'. Plus I was also able to incorporate pictures of at least ONE room in my new house...)

Ritualistic Treats

Since it is not an overly common occurrance for me to allow myself a food "treat", when I do have something I take it pretty seriously.

It is sort of like a special ritual for me.

I take my time picking out what I want. I think about it for quite some time to make sure that I enjoy the treat to the maximum. I want to make sure that I get exactly what I am craving.

And then when it comes time to actually eat the treat, I like to pick the perfect time. Not too close after a meal or it will not taste as good, but not too close to bed time or it will keep me awake and I will feel bad about eating it. And I like it to be when something else special is going on. If I am on my coffee break at work and am reading personal emails or blogs, or if a good TV show or a hockey game is on.

I also like to be sitting down in a comfortable spot.

I also like to pick out the perfect accompanying beverage. A nice cup of tea usually goes well with my treats - but the tea has to be steeped just right and has to be at the exact right temperature. I don't like it too hot so I have to plan ahead and make the tea and steep it and cool it for just the right amount of time before it is drinkable.

Even how I eat it is meticulous. I take small bites and chew and taste it. And I sip the tea to clear my mouth after every bit.

And this is how I enjoy a treat. I'm very particular about it and it is very ritualistic for me.

But being pregnant has somewhat changed that for me...

Today I was at the store picking up some things for dinner. I saw two chocolate long johns so I bought them without giving it a second thought. When I got home, I ate half of one while standing in my kitchen, over the chopping block in my underwear and I subsequently chased it down with a handful of potato chips. I then scarfed down the other half while I was lying in bed reading my book and washed it down by chugging some water and then I fell asleep.