Why I HATE going to the dentist

I knew it was going to be a shitty appointment from the minute I walked up to the reception desk and told the three ESL receptionists that I was there for my 3:30pm appointment and one of them looked at me blankly and said, "Your husband said you couldn't make it so we cancelled your appointment."

I said... "pardon?"

I had just spent the afternoon with Steve and he was barely aware of my dentist appointment. I was fairly sure that he didn't sneak into the other room and secretly cancel my dentist appointment.

Receptionist #1 says, "Yes, he said you couldn't make it."

*sigh* I lock my laser eyes on her and say through clenched teeth, "No... He didn't."

Receptionist #2 looks at Receptionist #1 and said, "Well her appointment is still open..."

So Receptionist #1 patronisingly says to me, "Well, it's ok then. Go have a seat."

Like Steve really did cancel my dentist appointment and I was crazy but they would be nice and let me have my appointment anyways....

I stood at the receptionist desk and laser-eyed her for a good 20 seconds before I slowly turned around and shaking my head, took a seat. When I sat down and refocused my laser eyes on her, she smiled again and said, "Don't worry, it's ok."

Seriously. Lady, I will punch you.

(In the meantime somebody's husband probably did cancel his wife's appointment and the receptionists were probably writing up the bill for $50 because she didn't show up and they didn't get any notice...)

The fun continued when the 18 year old dental hygienist came to get me for my cleaning. I was terribly frustrated that she was yet another NEW hygienist whom I've never seen before. In the two years I've been going to this dental office I've not seen the same hygienist twice. And so, as I do every time I go for a cleaning, I had to re-explain my dental history to this bimbette.

I proceeded to tell her that I have VERY sensitive teeth. That my mouth grows more plaque/tartar than the average person (sexy, I know) but that thankfully, my teeth don't get cavities. (I think I might have one filling). I tell her that my gums bleed very easily. I also tell her that I am pregnant and that right now they bleed easier than ever before. I tell her that I currently have a very weak stomach so flossing has been difficult for me, although I still do it.

And like she didn't hear a word I said, she replies with "Well, since you're pregnant, your gums are going to be more tender and bleed more than usual."

"Which is what I just..."

"And just because you are pregnant and have a weak stomach isn't an excuse to not clean your teeth properly. In fact it's more important than ever."

I snarl, "I DIDN'T SAY that I don't clean or floss my teeth anymore. I just said that my stomach is weak and flossing has been difficult."

Continuing to ignore me because she has been a hygienist for probably all of six months and clearly knows everything that there is to know about teeth says, "MmHm... well let's have a look."

And so the scraping begins. And as I predicted, I bleed. And she lets the blood pool in the back of my throat without suctioning it out until I think that I just might drown in my own blood and saliva. So when I start to make choking sounds, she finally picks up the mouth vacuum and starts sucking out the fluid. Then she proceeds to squirt ice cold water across my teeth - to which I react by jerking my teeth out of the torturous little bitch's reach because when you have sensitive teeth - that fucking hurts!!!

And she says, "Did you do that because your teeth are sensitive??"


Was that not the first bloody thing I mentioned to her??? For the love of god!!!!

This continues until she is finished scaling my teeth, at which point she launches into this little speech: "So yeah, your gums bleed quite easily. So it's really important that you brush your teeth twice a day for at least two minutes. And you need to floss every day - even if it makes you sick."

Right, because the stomach acid from my barf is probably really good for my teeth, right???

She didn't listen to a damn word I said in the beginning. And fuck you very much for insinuating that I don't brush my teeth twice a day! I take very good care of my teeth. And I TOLD her that. I cannot help that my teeth grow more plaque/tartar than most people, but it's not because I don't care for my teeth. Christ! That pisses me off!

She then said that she recommends that I come in every 4 months instead of every 6 months to get my teeth scaled....


I had requested this two years ago when I first started going to this dental office but the ESL receptionists had called me and told me that my insurance wouldn't cover that many cleanings in one year.

I told the bimbette hygienist this but she said she would talk to the receptionists and make the request anyways. Which she did. And the receptionists said they would put the request through to my insurance company.

When I asked why this should be any different from the last time I made this request the ESL receptionists looked at me like I was the crazy lady again, and said that this request had never been made before because there was nothing in my file....

At this point I'm looking around the office and trying to decide what I could use as a weapon. To my dismay there is nothing blunt or sharp in the reception area.

I am moving at the end of this month so I have the perfect excuse to never go back to this office again. My phone number and address will be changing so these idiots will never find me.

When the ESL receptionist handed me a pen and a card to fill out, to book my next appointment I declined, although I did consider stabbing her in the eye with the pen.

Incidentally - if anyone knows of a spectacular dentist in the North Delta / Surrey area - PLEASE let me know. (Email address on profile page)